So I took John’s advice and bought the hat from the wonderful Beatles shop they have at 223 Baker Street, London, NW1 6XE, England, UK for about £20. I got back on my Penny Farthing and cycled to Newquay, meeting my friend and video director Garry John Oliver Serge Wood who had arrived that morning in his hovercraft.
John Lennon rang me the other week
Me: “Hello?”
John: “Hey Harvey, it’s John here.”
Me: “John who?”
John: “John Lennon. You know, from The Beatles.”
Me: “Fuck off mate. John Lennon was brutally assassinated in 1980.”
John: “No seriously man; that whole assassination thing was a PR stunt to take the CIA heat off me. I’m alive and well and living at the Mull of Kintyre with Yoko, Paul, and his new bird – happy families mate.”
Me: “Well I never….”
John: “Yeah…. Well, anyway, I heard you’re shooting a video next week for your new single ‘Sinner’s Song’…”
Me: “Indeed I am John, can’t wait!”
John: “Great song by the way.”
Me: “Thanks John.”
John: “Anyway, I was thinking that you should perhaps wear one of those hats I used to sport when I was going through me Bob Dylan phase – it’ll look boss.”
Me: “You reckon?”
John: “Yeah! Go for it lad!”
Me: “Do you know what John? I think I will!”
John: “You won’t regret it pal.”
Me: “Thanks for calling John, good to hear from you. Take care.”
John: “You too Harvey. Ta ra.”
Me: “Bye.”
John: “………………………….”
Me: “Are you still there John?”
John: “Yeah. I was waiting for you to hang up first.”
Me: “No, you hang up.”
John: “But I want you to hang up first…”
Me: “No, you hang up first.”
John: “No, you.”
Me: “Nope. You.”
John: “FUCKING HANG UP OR I’LL COME ROUND AND FOOKIN BATTER YA!!!”
Me: *click*
